The A's-Tigers series should never end

Melvin: 'You gotta finish it out for nine innings'

The A's-Tigers series should never end
October 9, 2013, 12:00 am
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The winner of Thursday's decisive Game 5 between the A's and Tigers will face the Red Sox in the ALCS. (AP)

You may well hate that the A’s couldn’t close the deal Tuesday in Detroit, but two things must be said.

One, who in their right mind wouldn’t want one more game in this, the only series in the postseason that has been exemplary for play and strategic debate? This series frankly should never end, and that includes watching the bullpens drown in flop sweat.

And two, if you’re worried about the fact that the A’s have never won a Game 5 in a divisional series, then you are prone to obsess over the Brooklyn Dodgers way too much.

And frankly, who doesn’t want that?

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Ignoring the nagging fact that the Oakland Raiders have to renegotiate their joint powers agreement with the people who run the Coliseum (hey, don’t yell at me; you’re the ones who voted for them), let us consider the more disturbing ramification of the NFL having three games in London next year, with the home teams being Oakland, Atlanta and Jacksonville.

Namely, that the NFL has decided to callously disregard Great Britain’s role in defeating the Nazi menace in World War II and allow the nation to be invaded by the Black Hole Alumni Organization. Sure, they aren’t nearly as fearsome any more as, say, Millwall fans, but symbology matters. In other words, unless there is transportation provided to and from the U.S. embassy, this looks like a problem waiting to happen.

 

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Speaking of The National Association of Hall Monitors, the NFL apparently is now empowered to compel teams to participate in HBO’s Hard Knocks. If a team won’t volunteer, the league can apparently compel any team other than those who:
•       Have made the playoffs two years in a row.
•       Have a new head coach.
•       Have appeared on Hard Knocks within the last 10 years.

Too bad about those loopholes. I’d watch the show just to see Jim Harbaugh’s head explode when he found out he’d been “volunteered” to take one for the cable company. “Who’s got it better than us? Everybody.”

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There is a report that no Atlanta Brave would volunteer to catch Chipper Jones’ ceremonial first pitch before Monday’s 5-4 loss to the Dodgers – all because Jones predicted the Dodgers would win the series.

We’re sure all will be forgiven over the winter – when the Braves ask Jones to come back for Opening Day, dressed as William Tecumseh Sherman.

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David Shaw snapped back at Washington coach Steve Sarkisian for accusing the Stanford players of faking injuries in Saturday’s Cardinal victory. He called Sarkisian's accusations ''unprofessional'' and pointed out that the only coach he knows of who has told players to fake injuries works on Washington's staff. That would be Tosh Lupoi, who admitted to instructing players to fake injuries against Oregon while he was an assistant at Cal.

This would be all well and good, except that the two of them should prove to all of us what they really think of faking injuries, by being brought together for a no-holds-barred fistfight. There will no faking then.

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Detroit Lions center Dominic Raiola apologized for being a total reptile to members of the Wisconsin marching band Sunday, and atoned for his scatological and even gynecological insults by making what is being described as a sizable donation to the band.

This gives new meaning to the old lyric, “Seventy-six trombones led the big ‘My bad,’ and 110 coronets made it right.”

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Why Peyton Manning is Peyton Manning, No. 31,116: Telling Denver running back Knowshon Moreno in the dying moments of Sunday’s 51-48 win over Dallas that he needed to gain just enough yards for a first down but stop short of reaching the end zone so that the Broncos could run the clock down for the winning field goal without giving the ball to the Cowboys.

“He basically was asking me, 'How am I supposed to do that? How can I get a half-yard but not get a yard and a half?’” Manning told AP. “I just said, ‘You can't! You can't score! You can't do it!’”

He was right. It worked as Manning knew it would. And if you had Moreno on your fantasy team, you deserve what you didn’t get.

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Matt Millen gets his place in history, including the part where he helped blow the legs off the Detroit Lions as general manager, telling David Jones of the Patriot News of Harrisburg, PA, “What are you gonna do? You can’t hide from it. If it’s a turd, it’s a turd. They can’t put any make-up on it. It’s not going to do any good.”

That’s the beauty of Millen. He knows that it’s much harder for someone else to describe your work as a turd if you’ve already done so. Blame delegation is always mitigated when the person delegating it gets co-opted.

Then again, Millen might have been a bad general manager, but nobody ever accused him accurately of being a dope. Just a . . . well, never mind.

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And finally, the new San Jose State basketball floor is in keeping with the new rage of covering every inch of the wood with some combination of paint and caricature. But it does lack that certain over-the-top idea that pulls on casual onlookers – say, a pile of freshly slaughtered Athenians in front of the visitors’ bench. Not only do you get historical accuracy, but good-natured gore for the kids.

And frankly, who doesn’t want that?

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