Panic over Jeter's injury rivals Sharknado fears

Panic over Jeter's injury rivals Sharknado fears
July 11, 2013, 10:45 pm
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A Sharknado hitting New York City is less cause for concern than the possibility of Derek Jeter returning to the DL.

I watched zero seconds of Sharknado. I will not be bullied by Twitter, modern culture, or the horrors of television.

But I did read the hysterically panicked reactions to Derek Jeter’s leg injury in his first game back with the New York Yankees, and I decided I’d been unfair to Sharknado. Oh well. Maybe I’ll catch the sequel, Platypusphoon.

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Yasiel Puig clearly isn’t the national phenomenon we thought he was. Shows what we know . . . about popularity, about athletic gifts, about the lure of the Atlanta Braves, about the power of Freddie Freeman’s hugs, and maybe even about Steve Delabar.

Okay, that last one went one step over the ditch. But it’s still a pretty good humble for the know-it-all class.

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Ilya Kovalchuk did not leave $77 million on the table by retiring from the New Jersey Devils. He’s going to play in the Kontinental Hockey League, which is  merely Russian for “He’s changing tables.”

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Senator Harry Reid of Nevada referred to Washington manager Davey Johnson as “manager of the National Mets.” This is not a statement on his party affiliation or stance on any substantive issues, but seriously, what kind of insane Bobby Valentine nonsense is that?

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Metta World Peace, freshly amnestied by the Los Angeles Lakers’ ongoing garage sale, tweeted that he was going to play for the L.A. Kings. If Darryl Sutter doesn’t take him up on this, my respect for him will have diminished greatly.

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Moving past Aaron Hernandez’ spotty past and disturbing present, this hasn’t been said enough: His friends weren’t very nice to him, but they are very good at lifting and hurling a large and muscular man in front of a speeding bus. That’s a gift.

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Steve Stricker is skipping the British Open to be with his wife Nicki for their 20th anniversary, which is as good a reason as any. Most other golfers are skipping their wives for their 20th anniversary at the John Deere Classic. Which is not.

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And finally, if it seems like a slow news day, it’s because everyone stayed in for Sharknado. I will be spending my Friday renouncing my citizenship.