Sept. 8, 2011
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While youre liquoring up for a long weekend of ignoring your familys desperate pleas for you to become more involved in their lives, here are ten things to look for in Week One of the National Football Leagues Post-Lockout Extravaganza:
1. Kerry Collins will look goofy behind Jeff Saturday in Indianapolis.Unless, of course he gets a neck extension and becomes an auctioneer before every snap.2. The Detroit Lions will start well in Tampa Bay, thus justifying all the bad-team-about-to-be-good stories. And peter out shortly thereafter.3. Denver went from minus-1 to minus-3 in a matter of hours. Evidently the Tebow lobby doesnt bet.4. Cincinnati and Miami will get off to quick starts in the Andrew Luck Sweepstakes. But dont sleep on the Colts now.5. Sam Bradford will find out right away whether he got better or the job got worse.Home to Philadelphia and Nnamdi Asomugha.6. Michael Crabtree spoke.Set your alarms for October 9 when he next addresses the nation.7. Youll miss kickoff returns in your fantasy leagues:At least until global cooling in November.8. San Diego will struggle against Minnesota: Thus confusing Viking fans who are bound to be disappointed, and Charger fans who can still bank on having the division won by December 1.9. The 49ers are 5 -point favorites against Seattle:Despite there being no guarantee theyll score 5 points.10. The most popular player in the National Football League is now Curtis Painter: Hint:Hes Kerry Collins backup.