Harbaugh waxes nostalgic over Alex Smith
Jim Harbaugh, Colin Kaepernick and the 49ers take on Alex Smith and the Chiefs on Friday in Kansas City. (AP)
"He's no longer on our team. Not a trusted agent anymore." -- Jim Harbaugh on Alex Smith (AP)
I AM ADAM M. ROSALES, I LIVE AND WORK IN SEAT 6C SOMEWHERE BETWEEN ALBUQUERQUE AND LOS LUNAS, NEW MEXICO, AND I AM ON THE SOUTHWEST AIRLINES FANTASY TEAM.
[RELATED: Adam Rosales a Ranger ... again]
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So Alex Smith is no longer "a trusted agent?" Well, okay then. But we have questions.
1. Does Jim Harbaugh run a spy operation, and if so, why doesn't he have a cooler name, like "Number Two," "M," "Chief" or "Mister Burns?"
2. Did Smith have to augment his income in San Francisco by working for State Farm, Century One, or Peet's Coffee?
3. Does this mean Colin Kaepernick IS a trusted agent? And does that mean the clock is running toward the moment when he is no longer trusted?
4. And finally, given the way Harbaugh demoted Smith from "trusted" to "not trusted" to "less than trusted" to maybe "completely devoid of any level of trust," doesn't it behoove Smith to respond by saying, "If that's true . . . if you don't know . . . who I am . . . then . . . maybe your best course . . . would be to tread lightly?"
Now we just have to get Smith to shave his head.
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Whitey Bulger, the notorious Boston mobster, thug, brute, extortionist, murderer and entrepreneur, was convicted Monday on 31 of 32 counts of felonious heinousness. On the other hand, one of the things he gets to keep (presumably because he didn’t either steal it, extort it or threaten its owner) is the Stanley Cup ring he obtained from an as-yet-unspecified person. Rumors have abounded that he got it from former Montreal Canadiens player Chris Nilan, who married the daughter of Bulger’s then girlfriend, but it is not known if or how this happened.
It is, however, true that Bulger, while still a fugitive from a continent-wide FBI manhunt, managed to slip into Vancouver to watch one of the 2011 Cup Final game against his apparently beloved Bruins.
The franchise must be so proud.
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The more I hear about Signin’ Johnny Football, the more I find the NCAA’s silence on the matter interesting. Maybe getting their noses slapped with an online version of the collected works of Jay Bilas has caused them to give the enforcement department the rest of the summer off.
Then again, it’s not like the NCAA has been feeling good about itself lately. Then again, it’s not like it’s done much to allow itself to feel good about itself. Then again, then again, it’s the NCAA. They could forget all the ways it makes money and reminds itself of its core mission – making ALL the money.
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Knowing Anthony John Pierzynski for as briefly as we did, we can not be surprised that he said something particularly unpleasant to home plate umpire Ron Kulpa Monday to get ejected from the Yu Darvish Almost-Perfect-Nearly-No-Hitter-Not-Quite-A-Shutout-And-Damned-Near-A-Complete-Game. But you have to give Kulpa credit – he made his mind up very quickly.
And you have to give Pierzynski credit for finding the magic word as quickly as he did, as well as sharing the potential historical moment with his backup, Geovany Soto. That’s the sign of a real veteran presence.
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Such it is with Alex Rodriguez and the general esteem in which he is held that only he could get yelled at for seeking legal chemicals to enhance his performance.
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Rex Ryan does not go gently into that good night, that’s for damned sure. When asked Monday for his impression of West Virginia head coach Dana Holgorsen and those players who talked about leadership shortcomings and rampant agendas on the 2012 Mountaineer team – and more to the point, quarterback Geno Smith’s contributions to that – Ryan said simply, ““No, but it tells me I'm glad my kid never went there. Tell you that much.”
And Morgantown’s retail outlets are now selling Jets paraphernalia at yen on the dollar.
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The Washington Nationals are having a better season than the Giants, though the gap narrowed some Monday when the team sued and insurance company for not doing more to ferret out an alleged scam by two former employees and former 16-year-old draft choice Esmailyn Gonzalez for actually being 20 and being Carlos Alvarez Lugo. The two scouts, Jose Baez and former major league pitcher Jose Rijo, were fired after the Nationals found out about Gonzalez/Alvarez/16/20, and are suing Westchester Fire Insurance to recoup part of the $1.4 million signing bonus Alvarez received for being Gonzalez.
And you think one more year of Barry Zito is so bad.
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Ken Griffey got something better than a plaque when he was inducted into the Seattle Mariners Hall of Fame Saturday night. When he told former teammate Jay Buhner, “There’s no other person in this world, other than my parents, that if something ever happened to me or my wife, that I would want to raise my kids,” Buhner smiled, teared, and flipped Griffey off in the time-honored way.
Hard to know if that was just good-natured ballplayer tomfoolery, Buhner’s way of saying how touched he was, or a statement on Buhner’s attitude toward Griffey’s children.
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And finally, here’s to Alexander Poulides, the alleged banana-hurling menace who turned himself in to the San Jose Mercury News digital department to say that the banana wasn’t aimed at Baltimore’s Adam Jones or even intended for his viewing, but a statement on the general eptitude of the Giants.
[RELATED: Fan who threw banana at Jones speaks out]
Of course, he could have flung anything else to express his dismay, maybe even a plastic bottle of beer. But nahhh, that wouldn’t have happened. He sounds like the kind of guy who would have caught the bottle in mid-air and drank the contents before it, or he, landed.
Either way, he took the bullet for the notion that the Bay Area doesn’t have a problem with its view of people who are different in some superficial way. Even though, like everywhere else on the planet, it does.