Kaepernick's former coach, former teammate join forces

Kaepernick's former coach, former teammate join forces
May 14, 2013, 5:30 pm
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Alex Smith will work with Colin Kaepernick's college coach Chris Ault in Kansas City. (USA TODAY IMAGES)

Chris Ault is going to reconstruct Alex Smith’s career in Kansas City. Or he is hedging his bets in San Francisco 49ers history. Or he has a secret plan for making Chase Daniel into Russell Wilson. Either way, Colin Kaepernick is . . . well, too busy at the Warriors game to be unhappy about it.

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If it is true that Titus Young has become unhinged because of a 2011 concussion that has caused mental and behavioral problems, the NFL is in it up to its eyelids yet again. If not, he is. Either way, a happy ending seems very unlikely, and you may rest comfortably knowing that the NFL will divorce itself from Young no matter what the results of brain scans might produce.

But minicamps continue apace, so be happy.

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Andrew Wiggins’ deal with Kansas means the clock on him coming out for the NBA Draft is at T-minus-318 days and counting. I mean, why waste time wondering, right?

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The Canadian bloggist (blogster? blogman?) Tyler Dellow sat down with a calculator and, we presume, a bottle of scotch, and figured out that what happened Monday night to the Toronto Maple Leafs -– blowing a three-goal lead with four minutes left in regulation and then losing in overtime -- will happen once every 159 years. He points out that Halley’s Comet shows up approximately twice in that span.

So yeah, way to go Leafs. If you gotta go, go out with both middle fingers pointed right at the laws of probability.

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We should have known that Bryce Harper running an outfield wall would have induced someone –- in this case, at CBSSports.com –- to suggest that Harper plays too hard. That’s a good one –- encouraging 20-year-olds to find the magic 97 percent playing level. Somewhere, Derrick Rose is laughing through the pain, such as it is.

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One 34 shopping days until the Kobe Bryant memorabilia case is scheduled to go to court -– I mean, in case you have some Lower Merion commemoratives you want to give to your kid for graduation.

Or, if his mom has access to them, some of those cool shots of his foot surgery. Just the thing for breakfast placemats for the kids.

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Bob Ley’s work at Outside The Lines is, of course, exceptional, but he’s just been given the story of the century and he looks like he’s going to punt it. He received this letter and promptly put it on Twitter, with the requisite implied nod/wink combo:

BOB,

HOPE THIS DOESN’T SOUND TOO MUCH LIKE THE GRASSY KNOLL THEORY BUT, ANY CHANCE THAT JOE PATERNO IS ACTUALLY STILL ALIVE? LIVE IN THE HEART OF NITTANY LION COUNTRY AND AS THE TRIALS APPROACH FOR THE OTHER 3. MANY HERE ARE REALLY PONDERING THIS.

THANKS,

DOUG

Boy, is Ley going to feel the right Charlie when JoePa shows up at the Spanier trial as a surprise witness. And in honor of that, Raymond Burr will also come back to life to handle the questioning.

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And finally, the guy you’re thinking of when you look at Stephen Curry’s feet is Andrew Toney. He had a nine-year career that looked like it might be twice that except for balky ankles that never got right. That said, for his work in repeatedly torturing the Celtics in the postseason, he became known as The Boston Strangler. Curry’s menacing nickname is still being discussed by the marketing department in Oakland, where “Splash Brothers” has already hit its sell-by date for excessive lameness.